We’re exploring the shifting landscape of relationships, gender, and sexuality with the best writers, thinkers, and creators. Join award-winning journalist Blair Hodges to learn more about who we are and how we connect with each other in order to build a better world.
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After experiencing a devastating miscarriage, writer Ayana Lage was thrilled to welcome a new child. She wasn't so thrilled with the accompanying sleeplessness, mania, and hallucinations, which included the delusion that God was speaking directly to her. Ayana was experiencing postpartum psychosis, a rare but potentially life-threatening maternal mental health emergency. In this deeply personal conversation, Ayana joins Blair Hodges to discuss her memoir, Missing Me: A Memoir of Postpartum Psychosis and the Long Road Back. She describes what psychosis actually felt like from the inside, includ
Donald Trump launched his political career by spreading the lie that Barack Obama was not born in the United States. He launched his second term as president trying to overturn the plain and long-held intent of the 14th Amendment. In both cases, birth certificates played a crucial role. Historian Susan J. Pearson returns to unpack the Supreme Court's recent birthright citizenship decision, the proposed SAVE Act, and why birth certificates have become one of the most politically contested documents in the United States. Drawing on the history behind The Birth Certificate: An American History, s
History is often told through revolutions, presidents, and wars. Historian Ada Ferrer tells it through the experience of her own family. When Ferrer was just 11 months old, her mother fled Cuba with her in her arms, leaving behind a 9-year-old son she hoped to reunite with soon. Decades later, after her parents' deaths, Ferrer uncovered boxes of letters, keepsakes, and forgotten records that revealed not only what happened to her family, but what history can look like when seen through ordinary lives instead of famous names. In this conversation, the Pulitzer Prize-winning historian discusses
If you have one, your American birth certificate may be the most powerful piece of paper you own. It can open doors to citizenship, school, employment, and legal recognition. Which means it can also been used to enforce segregation, restrict marriage, erase Native identities, police gender, and m re. Historian Susan J. Pearson uncovers the surprising history of the birth certificate and reveals how a seemingly mundane document became a powerful tool for defining race, family, and belonging in America. At a moment when birth certificates are once again at the center of political battles over se
In 1959, a young University of Florida student was pulled out of his final exam by police and taken to a motel room for interrogation. His suspected crime: being gay. Journalist Robert Fieseler uncovers the hidden history of Florida's Johns Committee, a state-backed investigation that targeted Black activists, supposed communists, and LGBTQ people. Drawing from previously confidential records, Fieseler traces how fear became a political weapon—and how ordinary people fought back through the courts, protest, and in acts of personal courage. Their conversation explores the human cost of these in
The rainbow flag signals unity. Reality under the banner is messier. Professor Kaila Story has spent her life navigating spaces where parts of her identity are welcomed while other parts are pushed aside. As a Black lesbian, she has encountered racism within queer communities, queerphobia within Black communities, and exclusion even among people who claim to be fighting for liberation. Drawing from her book The Rainbow Ain't Never Been Enuf: On the Myth of LGBTQ+ Solidarity, Kaila explores why marginalized groups don't automatically stand together, how racism and respectability politics contin
Holly Brown loves TV sitcoms. Growing up, her own family looked like the prototype for must-see TV: a charismatic dad who worked on a top sitcom in Hollywood, siblings and a mother filling the other familiar family roles. Until it all started to fall apart. As though the writers were playing some kind of sadistic joke. And as her father was dying of cancer, he revealed a secret no one had told her—Holly and her siblings had five-year-old twin half brothers. Holly joins Blair to talk about her genre-bending new podcast, Everybody Knows But Me, which blends memoir, investigative storytelling, wi
Kevin James Thornton built a massive audience singing absurd stories from his evangelical past in an auto-tune style on TikTok. But underneath the humor were years of loneliness, secrecy, religious fear, and the slow unraveling of a series of lives he thought he was supposed to live. Kevin talks about growing up in a "super fundamentalist" church in Indiana, youth-group purity culture, heartbreak, trying to escape being gay, coming to terms with himself, comedy, and why it’s never too late to start over. Kevin’s new memoir is Big Baby: On Endings, Beginnings, and An Interdimensional Cat. Full
Why do racist comments from loved ones cut more deeply than overt racism from strangers? What makes it so difficult to name harm when it comes from someone who cares about you? And how do you respond when good intentions don’t match real impact? Samira Mehta says growing up in a mixed-race family showed her how love and harm can coexist in complicated, often invisible ways. Through personal stories—about food, family expectations, code-switching, and cultural belonging—Mehta gives voice to the constant negotiations navigated by mixed-race people. Samira Mehta is author of The Racism of People
We talk a lot about women’s reproductive health. We rarely talk about men’s. But that gap isn’t just cultural—it’s built into science itself. In this episode, Yale sociologist Rene Almeling explains how modern medicine ended up with an entire field devoted to women’s reproductive systems—and no real equivalent for men. From a failed 19th-century push for “andrology” to today’s emerging research on sperm and health, we trace how this imbalance took shape. Along the way, we look at what new science is starting to reveal: how age, smoking, and environmental exposures can affect sperm—and why most
She thought there would always be more time to explore—until a routine hike nearly killed her. In this mini episode, Bailey Buckles recounts how a sudden, life-threatening infection drove home the fact that tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. It was an especially powerful moment, because as a transgender woman of color in America, she hadn't always wanted to stay alive. From climbing mountains to showing up online as her full self, Bailey strives to live with greater urgency, purpose, and joy. Full transcript is available here at relationscapes.org. Show Notes Bailey Buckles, "At 38, I Still Felt Like
If you lost touch with reality, how would you even tell the difference? That's the question Sarah Labrie had to confront after her mother was found on the side of a Houston freeway in the midst of a schizophrenic break. And she also wondered, "Am I next?" In this candid conversation, Sarah discusses growing up between extremes of adoration and abuse, witnessing a parent’s mental illness, struggling with perfectionism, and looking for healthy relationships, until the weight of her own artistic ambition almost brought her to mental collapse. We explore parallel worlds—of mother and daughter, of
Dogs didn’t just become our companions. They helped make us human. They've been by our side for tens of thousands of years, helping us herd and hunt, migrate, heal, grieve, fight war, imagine the afterlife, and more. Religion and environmental studies scholar Laura Hobgood joins us to explore the long, complicated co-evolution of humans and dogs—how humans have loved, used, protected, and sometimes harmed them in return. Her book is called A Dog’s History of the World: Canines and the Domestication of Humans. Whether you love dogs, miss one deeply, or have never thought much about them at all,
Some songs take decades to reveal what they’re really about. Back in the 90s when 20-year-old Steven Page wrote “What a Good Boy,” he understood it as a plea to ease up on restrictive gender expectations that harmed boys and girls. But as he performed it over the years, he realized it was about much more than that. The stirring anthem has become a greater exploration of gender identity and sexuality, a perennial wrestle against a binary world's hostility to people who don't fit the mold—trans, nonbinary, genderqueer, gay, or otherwise. Page, a founding member of the smash-hit band Barenaked La
When George M. Johnson was a kid growing up in New Jersey, they loved Black History Month. They were thrilled to learn about the people who shaped American history for the better. But as they got older, they started noticing things were missing—hidden stories that might have meant the most to a queer kid like they were. George was especially drawn to one of the most dazzling moments in Black history, the Harlem Renaissance. They went searching for what had been covered up, forgotten, or erased, and resurrected those stories in their book, Flamboyants: The Queer Harlem Renaissance I Wish I'd Kn
Is it possible to raise kind, feminist boys in our era of manosphere misogyny? Sonora Jha, an Indian-American immigrant and single mother, says yes. But it takes a lot more than good intentions. She reflects on raising her son across cultures, teaching empathy through film, talking frankly about sex, consent, and body image, and modeling apology without demanding forgiveness. She pushes back on the idea that feminism harms boys, showing how it can actually free them from shame, silence, and isolation. Sonora Jha joins us to talk about her book, How to Raise a Feminist Son: Motherhood, Masculin
Adoption is often framed as a loving and selfless decision made by women who want to give their babies a better life—but many relinquishing mothers say it doesn’t actually feel like a real choice at all. Private domestic adoption in the U.S. operates under conditions of high demand, limited supply, and deep economic inequality. Researchers say women rarely choose adoption over abortion or parenting, and many relinquishing parents report long-term trauma. Sociologist Gretchen Sisson draws on a decade of interviews in her book Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American
We’re a little over halfway through January and it's already been A LOT. The Trump administration kidnapped the de facto Venezuelan president. The chairman of the Federal Reserve announced he’s being targeted for prosecution because the president wants to control monetary policy. A queer mother in Minneapolis was shot in the head in broad daylight by ICE, who is occupying the city, and the government has been trying to portray her as a terrorist. And etc. Andrea Pitzer is one of my favorite political analysts right now, and I asked her how we might make it out of this mess. She explains why th
The overturning of Roe v. Wade, which allowed states to outlaw abortion, has had devastating consequences for women across the country—especially because the American health care system was already making pregnancy more dangerous and more unequal in blue states and red states alike. In her new book Unbearable, journalist Irin Carmon tells the stories of five women whose experiences uncover the realities of pregnancy in America: infertility, abortion, miscarriage, criminalization, racial inequality, and more. Their stories reveal a central truth: America has made choices that make pregnancy mor
What happens when you stop chasing romantic love entirely? After ending a catastrophic relationship, acclaimed author Melissa Febos took an unexpected step: despite being a serial relationshipper, she decided to take a personal vow of celibacy. What began as a three-month break became a full year that transformed how she understood desire, boundaries, people-pleasing, and love itself. In her latest book The Dry Season: A Memoir of Pleasure in a Year Without Sex, Febos reflects on addiction-like romance, the freedom of solitude, feminist role models across history, and how abstaining from sex h
We grow up swimming in gender stereotypes: men are from Mars, women are from Venus. Men are rational and women are emotional. The binary cliches are everywhere, but are they true? Daphna Joel is a neuroscientist who wanted to know what the science actually says. When she looked at real brains she discovered that each person carries a unique mix of traits, a true mosaic that defies the old binary. Daphna Joel joins us to talk about her groundbreaking book Gender Mosaic: Beyond the Myth of the Male and Female Brain. Full transcript is available here at relationscapes.org. Show Notes Do your own
The Bible remains one of the world's most influential books, impacting believers and non-believers alike. As Christian nationalists gain more power over American politics right now, it's as important as ever to understand how the Bible is used to justify laws about abortion, gay marriage, child abuse, and more. Luckily, Bible scholar Dan McClellan is here to give us the data. He's become wildly famous on TikTok unpacking what the Bible really says about these contentious issues, and many more besides. His new book is called The Bible Says So: What We Get Right and Wrong about Scripture's Most
The Department of Education is being dismantled before our eyes. Why does it matter, and can it be rescued? Reporter Laura Pappano joins us with updates on these things, and her latest visit to the Moms for Liberty conference in Florida, where a new tactic is emerging. Full transcript is available here at relationscapes.org. Show Notes "Moms for quote-unquote 'Liberty,' (with Laura Pappano)," Relationscapes (September 2, 2025) Relationscapes, "How Children's Rights Impact Everyone (with Adam Benforado)." Recent Laura Pappano articles: "Moms (and Cool, Young Podcasters) for Liberty," Slate (Oct
Shen Yang broke the law simply by being born. It was the 1980s in China, and according to the One Child Policy, her parents weren't allowed to have her. They sent her away with relatives, and what followed were years of cruelty and neglect, but also defiance and the will to thrive. It's hard to find stories directly from excess children. Shen Yang's book is a rare gem. It's called More Than One Child: Memoirs of an Illegal Daughter. She joins us to talk about it in this episode. Full transcript is available here at relationscapes.org. About the Author Shen Yang is author of the book, More Than
Chelsey Goodan says that for too long, teenage girls have been undervalued and overlooked. As a longtime tutor and mentor to hundreds of girls from many different backgrounds, Chelsey realized why so many were anxious and hurting. Because too many people treat teenage girls as problems to be controlled or solved. Chelsey says they have much to offer on topics like perfectionism, friendship, identity, shame, power, and more. Whether you’re a parent, teacher, mentor, or just curious, this conversation will help you better appreciate what teenage girls have to offer. Full transcript available at
