Welcome to the podcast where I, a film critic, take my dad, the most opinionated person I know, to the movies. This is the car ride home.
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Episode 102: Tony Tony is the superhero origin story for one of the culinary world’s greatest personalities, Anthony Bourdain. Dominic Sessa plays Tony, who spends the two-hour runtime sulking in the corner of every room he enters. He’s a sad, scrawny little guy, and that’s normally all Tina needs to enjoy a film, but this one just doesn’t deliver. Somehow they missed all the charisma and personality that Bourdain's fans know from his many shows and books. Stratis didn’t have much good to say either. We did learn how to shuck an oyster, so that’s something. Music - "New York Big Jazz" by Magik
Episode 101: The End of Oak Street Anne Hathaway and Ewan McGregor take us back to the ’80s, but then they get flung straight into the Jurassic age in this time-traveling wormhole of a movie. Tina and Stratis discuss the important question of whether dinosaurs are red or white meat and how these weird sci-fi movies are just metaphors for the ills of humanity. Given that this movie had both wormholes and dinosaurs, you would think that would have been enough to pull Stratis in, but he still wanted more, while Tina was totally checked out. How much more does a filmmaker need to make us happy? Oh
Episode 100: One Night Only This is our one hundredth episode and we couldn’t be happier. If you ask Google AI about this podcast, it says, “Tina provides professional critical insight, while Stratis offers hilariously candid, unfiltered reactions.” Who can argue with an algorithm? As for this week’s movie, if you’ve ever wondered what a rom com would be like in a dystopian world where sex was illegal except for one day of the year, this one’s for you. One Night Only is a mash-up of Sleepless in Seattle and Logan’s Run, with Fingernails thrown in for some sci-fi techno fun. We have very differ
Episode 99: Spider-Man: Brand New Day We’re back in the world of superheroes, and this time we aren’t talking about the Odyssey. Spider-Man: Brand New Day lets us fly through the canyon walls of NYC better than any thrill ride does. Guess which one of us just doesn’t care? It’s Tina, and she spends much of our ride wishing superhero movies would do more than just retell the same old stories. She’s seen it all before and blames Hollywood for not investing enough in unique takes on this genre. And she’s still upset about the last Supergirl movie. Stratis, like the rest of the audience, was just
Episode 98: Her Private Hell Have you been searching for hours of experimental cinema filled with colorful lights and shadows and not much else? If so, director Nicolas Winding Refn has made the perfect movie for you – Her Private Hell. It’s two hours of confusing artistic cinema with some daddy issues thrown in for fun. Tina tries to explain this “masterpiece” to Stratis, but all he got out of it was his new critic’s slogan: It’s a piece of moving art. He thought that was original, but it’s NOT. The actors and the composer were totally committed to Refn’s vision, making this a textured experi
Episode 97: The Odyssey The Greeks are back, BABY! Director and writer Christopher Nolan takes on the epic retelling of Homer's The Odyssey, and Stratis is all in. Tina, on the other hand, wasn’t convinced. She thought Nolan didn’t get "freaky" enough with the classic and had some serious notes on casting. Actually, we both had issues with the casting, but we were in total agreement on Agamemnon’s bronze vertebrae helmet. What a work of art. Somebody should get an Oscar for that. Lastly, how did Nolan make a movie about ancient Greeks without putting even one Greek actor somewhere in the epic
Episode 96: The Invite Getting out of the parking lot this week was a bit rough, even after watching a great Olivia Wilde movie - The Invite. The first third of the movie worried Stratis because he thought he’d have to discuss an orgy film with his daughter. Luckily, the movie took a turn midway and he was saved. We moved on to the fact that Wilde directed and starred in this movie and talked a bit about the way actors and directors approach a script. The other actors in this film did a great job, but we had to take a pause to visit Pittsburgh's own, Page’s Dairy Mart, for some soft serve befo
Episode 95: Minions & Monsters How did we celebrate America’s 250th birthday? Fireworks, hot dogs, and a cold beer? NOPE. We saw Minions & Monsters at our local cineplex! Okay, it was only the 3rd of July, but that didn’t help us agree on much. We do think the animator did a great job of taking the Minions back to 1927 Hollywood, complete with callbacks to great actors and movies from that era. And just to spice up this episode, we swing by the Wendy’s drive-through to pick up a couple of Minionion-themed kid's meals. You’re going to get a review of the movie and our food choices this week. Ha
Episode 94: Supergirl It’s a bird, it’s a plane, it’s…we can’t agree on what Supergirl is all about. This is Tina’s favorite type of bummer superhero cinema and nothing like the superheroes of Stratis’ youth. We get into the morality of using human trafficking and dog torture to get the audience emotionally connected to the characters. Tina tries to buy an intergalactic fizz cocktail but ends up being thwarted by the AMC bartender. Let’s just say that superhero movies aren’t simple good-versus-evil stories anymore, so whether you agree with Tina or Stratis, this episode will bring you into our
Episode 93: Masters of the Universe By the power of Grayskull we are transported to the mythical planet of Eternia, home of He-Man. Let’s just say that Masters of the Universe does not bring to mind our ideal vacation spot, but Stratis did manage to take a couple of relaxing naps during the movie. Somehow Tina analyzes He-Man’s gender identity issues while Stratis has flashbacks to his college dorm. Overall, we do a great job of showing off how little we know about the He-Man universe, and this movie didn’t make us want to try to learn more. Music - "New York Big Jazz" by MagikStudio/Jamendo/A
Episode 92: The Sheep Detectives If you’re looking for a movie to teach your small children about murder and the horribleness of humanity, then maybe you’ll find it in The Sheep Detectives. If you listen to the voices of the internet, then you’ll think Tina and Stratis are just wrong about this movie. Their hearts were not warmed even a little. Heck, these sheep almost put Stratis to sleep, and even Sir Patrick Stewart could barely keep him awake! Tina did have the fun of sitting next to her nine-year-old cousins and managed to pick up some secondhand enthusiasm for sheep humor. Music - "New Y
Episode 91: Is God Is Is God Is is a crazy title for a film, but it fits this most unique twin-sisters revenge epic as they try to deal with a horrible childhood. Kara Young and Mallori Johnson play the twin sisters amazingly well, if not a bit too disturbingly, but that’s more Aleshea Harris’ choice since she’s both director and screenwriter. Tina believes the moral of this movie is that love is a thing that can both protect us and can consume us, but Stratis is just left with way too much sadness. Music - "New York Big Jazz" by MagikStudio/Jamendo/Adobe Stock
Episode 90: Tuner Stratis is thrilled that this week’s film doesn’t have any talking sheep or a ridiculous amount of blood and guts. Instead, we’re treated to an actual story with real characters. At least that's what he thought of Tuners. The film takes us into the world of a master piano tuner who also has hyper-sensitive hearing. What else can he do with his super hearing? Crack safes for the mob and fall in love at the same time. Screen legend Dustin Hoffman brings some old-school charm, and we both really enjoyed his performance. One last thing - not sure why but Tina tells us way too muc
Episode 89: Star Wars: The Mandalorian and Grogu If you want to slog through a galaxy far far away, then maybe you’re a good candidate for the latest Star Wars film, The Mandalorian and Grogu. We definitely didn't have the Force with us on this one. Tina spent most of the movie curled up in a ball and Stratis managed to nap through the really loud fight scenes. We both thought the musical score was fantastic and the composer deserved a better movie to work with. We did get to talk about Blade Runner and why Sigourney Weaver hasn't made it to Star Trek yet. At least that's something. Music - "N
Episode 88: I Love Boosters The theme of this week’s movie is Fashion Forward Philanthropy, and if that doesn’t make sense to you then you probably need to go see I Love Boosters. Boots Riley’s latest film takes us on a psychedelic ride through Los Angeles while stealing high-fashion clothing. Guess who showed up at the theater wearing an I Love Boosters t-shirt? Tina, so you know she’s all in on Riley’s vision. Stratis, on the other hand, has some mixed opinions. He was all ready to enjoy a madcap, Scooby Doo-like crime caper, just like the one he was promised in the trailer. Instead, he was
Episode 87: Obsession This week’s movie, Obsession, creates drama for Stratis right from the start. A co-dependency love story is just too much for him to handle. According to him, this film is somehow boring and deeply disturbing at the same time. On the other hand, Tina loved it and would be happy to see it many more times. How are we even related? Our backseat sentient being makes an appearance and comes up with a great pull quote that summarizes the movie nicely - Deeply Upsetting, Done Well. Our advice is that if you’re offered an opportunity to have your one big wish come true, steer cle
Episode 86: Mortal Kombat II Kombat is this week’s theme and we get right into it over the need for this movie to even exist. Is Mortal Kombat II actually a movie or just a bunch of video game scenes? Tina takes the stand that it’s a fun summer romp, but Stratis isn’t having any of it. Granted, he may have done some napping during important plot points, but he doesn’t think that mattered much. Here’s an Inside Baseball thought - how come the necromancer couldn’t bring this film back from the dead? Let’s just say this might be a hard sell for anyone other than people who are already fans of the
Episode 85: The Devil Wears Prada 2 It’s not often that a Meryl Streep movie causes us to have so little enthusiasm, but The Devil Wears Prada 2 is that kind of film. You can’t even blame it on not liking the original, because Tina’s a huge fan and Anne Hathaway will always be Princess of Genovia in her heart. The original’s magic comes from the awfulness of Streep’s character, back when evil bosses could really be evil. Even if they wanted to soften her up for a modern audience, why not criticize the current state of big-media journalism, fast fashion, or even the world of the billionaire cla
Episode 84: Over Your Dead Body Over Your Dead Body wants to be an enjoyable, quirky, dark comedy about love, relationships, and marriage, but it hits a brick wall that Tina can’t get past. Let’s just say there’s one scene that could have been left on the cutting room floor and we’d all have been better off. On the positive side, we both enjoyed Jorma Taccone’s skill at threading multiple story lines together. Their only connection is that they all take place in one cabin in the woods. Lastly, there’s the matter of a missing raccoon that we still want to know about, but the odds of a sequel do
Episode 83: Michael This week we joined some very passionate Michael Jackson fans at the press screening of Michael, and if you’re one of those true fans of the King of Pop, don’t even bother to listen to this episode. Put on your fedora and your sequined glove and go see this movie. You’ll love it. As for the two of us, this biopic has some flaws and we don’t hesitate to dig into them. Let’s just hope Michael’s lawyers aren’t listening. One fun fact about this screening is that the extended family of the director, Antoine Fuqua, was there. They gave his title credit a big round of applause, w
Episode 82: Hoppers Pixar's Hoppers takes a stab at environmentalism when they transfer the brain of a young, nature-loving woman into the body of a beaver. The beaver tries to stop the impending destruction of a beautiful glade full of happy little creatures to make way for the expansion of a city highway. We found a lot wrong with this film, even though it was written by a hometown boy (Jesse Andrews). Tina might have uncovered a Disney/Pixar conspiracy that involves turning minority characters into animal creatures - now we just need a catchy title for this conspiracy. Hoppers is one specia
Episode 81: Project Hail Mary You’d think a NASA-type space movie would be right up Stratis' alley, but Project Hail Mary follows an erratic trajectory. Stratis sums up the story of Ryan Gosling unwillingly going to space and meeting a rock. Meanwhile, we learn that Tina has a symbiotic crying relationship with Gosling. Just to make matters more interesting, we have multiple interactions with wildlife on the drive home. Hopefully they all survived. All things considered, Tina was right when she said she’s OK this movie exists. High praise indeed. Music - "Extra Fries" by The Fly Guy Five/Epide
Episode 80: K-Pops! What do you get when you mix a cross-cultural family dynamic with the world of Korean celebrity culture? K-POPS! It’s not obvious why the movie title has that exclamation point at the end because nothing about it brings excitement, except maybe watching Cathy Shim on the big screen. The rest of the film left both of us flat, but Tina does get a little passionate when she talks about how much the main character sucks. No, I mean really suuuucks! If you’re looking for a little Korean representation in a Hollywood film, this movie is a home run. For the rest of us, however, it
Episode 79: Nirvanna: The Band - The Show - The Movie Canadians Matthew Johnson and Jay McCarrol bring us this zany Back to the Future-inspired, friendship, murder, comedy movie with one hell of a title: Nirvanna: The Band - The Show - The Movie. Stratis enjoyed this film so much that it took him from the brink of slumber to fully awake and laughing at all the goofball jokes. Not surprisingly, Tina wasn’t as enthusiastic. There just wasn’t enough of her type of dry humor to make this work, but she does a good job of explaining movie copyright law. So if you're looking to relive the heyday of C
Episode 79: Oscars With My Mom Stratis sits this episode out so Tina can take her mom, Regina, along to make completely uninformed Oscar predictions based solely on studios’ promotional photos of nominated films and actors. Takeaways from Mom include “the tall man is so tall,” “I feel nothing,” and “that’s a very good crying face.” You don’t want to miss her pick for best picture! Maybe Hollywood should consider this approach for future awards. Music - "Extra Fries" by The Fly Guy Five/Epidemic Sound
